The other day I wheeled into the Sports Academy parking lot and have never in my life seen the lot overflowing with cars … specifically at 6am! I entered, geared up and made my way over to the machines … not one treadmill, elliptical, or bike was available. Every hamster wheel was occupied with sweaty, determined folk with an ambitious new year resolution to be fitter, thinner, sexier. I mentioned it to a woman next to me and she flatly replied, “Yeah, happens every year – by March the place is back to normal”.
Two questions seem to hang in the air at the first of each year.
1. 1. What drives us to set goals that statistically we’re so unlikely to stick to?
2. 2. What force(s) inhibit us from reaching these far-fetched goals?
Although my memory is about as useful as a spork, I’m quite sure I’ve set several personal goals for myself come January 1st every stinkin’ year throughout my adulthood. And since my math is about as good as my memory, let’s say that I’ve been setting goals for the past ten years. Only one year did I ever successfully hit my goals. One. Year. I’m sure you’re aware of the goal I speak of – my weight loss goal of 100 lbs. It was a smashing success, but that’s not my point today. What confounds and frustrates me (and likely you as well) is that only 10% of my goals in the past decade were attained! WTF! (it means Why The Face – watch Modern Family ;))
So – back to question 1 – how do we keep thinking that this time it’ll be different? Are we setting the wrong goals? Are we expecting too much from ourselves? Do we already know that we’ll mostly likely fail but choose the “reach for the stars” mentality because that’s what we’ve been taught? Did I just discuss a question with a slew of additional questions? Clearly you won’t find many answers here … just some food for thought … mmm food.
And question 2 – why do we stop? Why do we fail? What helped me succeed on that tenth time after losing miserably nine times prior? What’s the difference?
I suppose the most important question I want to pose to myself (and you diligent folk still reading this brain dump) is this: How can I make that 10% more like 50% … or is it ludicrous to even think 100%?
This is what I think it boils down to … at least this is my conclusion for the moment:
1. Set a minimum of 4 milestones for every goal. You know the saying – how do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time. And believe me, I was an elephant!
2. Tell as many people as you possibly can about your goal. ESPECIALLY if it’s slightly embarrassing --- like “I’m super fat and I want to lose it all this year”… that was embarrassing to me.
3. When you fall off the horse, (and by damn man, you absolutely will!) ask yourself if you are on the right horse – because occasionally you’ll realize that there’s a better horse right behind you that’ll take you the next 4 miles and help you get over a mountain you now realize your other crap horse could never get you over. And don’t forget to over-use lame horse analogies as often as needed.
4. Don’t follow the rules of some lame-o “self-help guru” --- or even some dude blogging about his amazing ability to lose some weight, then gain some back, then diet some more. We’re all playing this by ear and everyone is so fundamentally unique, every individual needs their own rules and guidelines. I know my weaknesses and strengths and my goal-reaching bible is penned primarily by me, with a dash of a various hand-picked authors/idealists.
So – there you have it. A quick idea of what seems to work for me. Now throw this in a blender, pull out the useless chunks that won’t break down and add the main ingredient: your unique secret sauce. That totally got cheesy at the end…
So – Holly mentioned that we needed to write a blog post this week and this is what you got. You were probably looking for adorable pics of Sonoma on the verge of crawling (she pulled herself up for the first time this week!), Ruby as a priceless snow bunny or Olivia assisting as sous-chef in the kitchen. Well, maybe next week.
