Just Be. Fun Run. Girl Power.

This whirlwind week began in normal whirlwind fashion. The girls and I keep busy running from school to work/babysitter to choir (for Viv) to dance (for Viv and Ru), and to a number for other miscellaneous things.
It is difficult to know how to balance all of the good opportunities we are blessed to choose from in life. On the one hand, we want our children to benefit from the many options out there – so many extra-curricular activities. On the other hand, they are still so young, and life will only get busier and busier. They need time to just be, and to enjoy downtime to discover who they are.

That being said, we are trying to expose our children to activities/lessons that we believe they are interested in. Olivia (5) has tried soccer and gymnastics. She is now trying dance and singing. Ruby (3) is just starting out with dancing. Next we may try rock climbing, swimming, and piano. Who knows where their real passions lie, and where they will excel. I think there is a reason why there are financial and time constraints on the amount of activities that we can try at a time. So, we are just doing the best that we can and feeling things out.

On another note, we had the opportunity to participate in an event celebrating International Day of Peace. It was Sonoma’s first peace vigil, and appropriately, she slept peacefully through the whole thing.
The next day (Saturday) we got up and went to a 1 mile fun run race to benefit an old friend of mine, Christina McEvoy. She has been diagnosed with stage 4 melanoma cancer. She has two young boys. Her husband Eric was a good friend of mine in high school. I was explaining all of this to my daughters (about why and for whom we were going to run). They were very serious, and then all on their own, suggested that they donate some money from their piggy banks. I was so touched by their thoughtfulness. It was so sweet to watch them bring their bank to the race, dump out some change, and take it to my friend, Eric (Christina stayed home because she didn’t feel well). If anyone reading this post would like to help them out, or run in the upcoming race for her in Kaysville, or would simply like to know more, visit http://www.iwillwinthisfight.com/ (Incidentally, it was the first race for all three of our girls – and for me, now that I think about it. They were troopers! We will definitely do more in the future… Kaysville).

Finally, I had the opportunity to go with my mom and sisters (and Sonoma and Bailee) to the General Relief Society Conference in SLC last night. We rode the Frontrunner from Ogden, then took Trax into downtown. We ate at my new favorite restaurant in SLC: One World Café (http://www.oneworldeverybodyeats.com/). The food was delicious and organic and local. More than that, their philosophy is amazing. I highly recommend that you check them out and go eat there.

After that, we headed to the Conference Center. I sat in a theatre room away from the crowd because that’s where they sent all the nursing moms (you can’t have crying babies in a room where a live broadcast is happening). It was a good conference. I really liked the prophet’s talk about not judging. My favorite part of the meeting was when Julie Beck announced an upcoming book about the history of Relief Society. In my adulthood, I have discovered women like Emmaline B. Wells (among others) and studied them. For a long time I was confused and disappointed by the fact that people in the church don’t learn about the women in the early church at church (aside from brief mentions of Emma and Lucy Mack Smith and Eliza Snow). So, woohoo! Now those women will be much more commonplace in church settings, and young women will have more female role models to look to. Yea.

A Cockroach Marathon

Yeah, strange title, I admit. But let me explain.

Last weekend Ruby's bilingual preschool asked us to take our turn watching the oh-so adorable pet cockroaches that reside at the school during the week. Not plain old cockroaches, mind you, but giant madagascar hissing cockroaches. The girls kept begging to hold them when we brought them home. You would think they'd be terrified of them, but they had almost no fear of them at all. It seems more and more clear to me that fear is a social construct. For example, hundreds of thousands of people die every year in America in car accidents, but only a handful from deadly spider bites. Yet the ratio of arachnophobia vs automobiphobia (my invention) proves our fears are illogical and absurd. Why doesn't the hair on our necks stand on end every time we step into a car ... as we are exponentially more likely cheating death than if we see a spider on the ceiling. In attempt to summarize–fear is organic and mortal. It can take whatever shape you allow it to, but you have the ability to mold it, trim it, or even kill it. I'm working on killing some of my own.

One example - a marathon. I wouldn't say I was terrified of running a marathon. What I would have said 18 months ago would be to say that the work and discipline required to reach that ability is greater than my desire to do so. (if that makes any sense) In the end, my fears were buried in several layers of justification. The fear of giving up junk food, being a fat guy at a gym, failing and gaining everything back, setting a goal I couldn't reach, and on and on.
In the end, in fact, I decided to commit to a half-marathon. And once I finally committed to douse those fears in Round-Up until they shriveled into nothingness, only then did I realize that all of those fears were nothing but self-deception - they were a mirage created by my poor habits in attempt to stay alive and thriving in my mind. And once I realized that they were nothing more than smoke and mirrors, it was then that I broke through the false barriers of fear and lost the weight and began running and training. The half marathon was difficult for a formerly-fat newbie, but I realized a marathon would be the most appropriate slap in the face for those habits that fed on my fears for so many years. It was one of the hardest, if not THE hardest thing I have ever done, but I'm so happy to be able to shove that marathon medal into the faces of those fears to remind them that they no longer have a home here ... that they have been exposed for what they truly are. Freedom from fear is critical, beautiful and profound freedom in life. I have many more fears to expose and purge, but I'm happy to be making progress. This marathon was a great milestone (pun intended, unfortunately) in my battle against fear.

In other news, life is good. It's the day after the marathon and my new fear is that I'll walk like a 94 year-old for the rest of my life! I'm more sore than ever in my life. Holly has been kind enough to massage my legs now and then, but they're so tender I'm afraid the meat will just fall off the bone! But I suppose I'll heal and be back at it in ... a few years :)

Sonoma keeps growing and getting more and more adorable. We're about to start letting her cry through the night and are dreading it. It's so hard to listen to that ... but not quite as hard as losing sleep for endless nights to come. She's generally a very mild and happy girl -- she's fantastic.

Ruby and Olivia are enjoying school and just love spending time playing with each other. Lately they've really taken to the CD player downstairs and love to sit and dance and sing along to all the random CDs Bailee and Holly have given them. It's entertaining to watch ... and if you don't watch, they'll make sure to stop and remind you to watch them.

I'll try and shorten the soapbox for next week!

This week's recipe: Homemade Tortilla Chips (they were so tasty!)

2 cups corn meal
1 cup white flower
Add water and mix until it sticks but isn't sticky
1 tsp salt
1 cup veg oil

Put the oil in a pan and heat it up to fry the dough. Mix the dough and add the salt in. Break the dough into small balls that are roughly 1 inch in diameter and roll out as thin as possible. Then cut into quarters (triangle shaped) and toss in the pan for a few seconds, then flip them over. When they're just turning golden, quickly grab with salad tongs (or whatever), let the oil drip off as best you can, then place onto paper towels or some material that can soak up some of the oil.

I like them unsalted, Holly perfers a bit of salt. Throw them all in a bag, toss in a few pinches of salt and shake the bag. There you go.

Everything Matters

I've recently been listening to a brilliant podcast series called "Design Matters" by Debbie Millman. Debbie is a designer who interviews some of the greatest minds in the design industry. But before each interview she gives a monologue about a recent experience in her life. The experience usually seems very insignificant, but she finds profound meaning in any and every experience in life. Where most of us dig for diamonds among the coal of the everyday life, she seems to recognize the unforeseeable value of every single experience.

I'd love to change my perspective ... to see life for what it really is rather than pass it off as uninteresting, unimportant or insubstantial. I believe more than ever that every event, every conversation, and every experience in life has far more meaning than we give it credit for. I'll do all I can to start seeing with this new perspective.

And now, stepping back into the superficial updates ... as there's rarely enough time to write with the heart and thought that I'd like.

Olivia has started kindergarten at Bear River Charter School and seems to sincerely enjoy it. Ruby is doing her last year of Union bilingual preschool and should be fluent at this point! Sonoma is 4 months today and is realizing that she has vocal chords ... especially during quiet times at church :) She's adorable and growing faster than her hand-me-downs can handle.

Apart from that, our garden is giving us more tomatoes and zucchini than we can handle ... and the fall is always a fantastic time for local whole foods. We've been making mango leather, zucchini brownies and fresh salsa. Such a stellar season for food!

Here are a few photos from the past few weeks.